Wednesday, February 24, 2010


Dear Maria,

You made it so perfect. Twelve followers. My twelve little blogger disciples, dwindled down now to eleven. You were neither family or friend, in other words, you were not obliged to read my ramblings.  I don't even know where you came from.  Houston, England, Delaware?  Why did you go away?  Was it my poor grammar?  Bad sentence structure?  Terrible jokes?  Lame delivery of the terrible jokes?

My morning had been full of sunshine and thoughts of babies on rainbows.  Now, my thoughts are of rain clouds and pre-teens on stimulants.

You made me believe in myself, in my skills as a writer and a dreamer, philosopher, architect, historian, biographer, daredevil-beauty queen.  See, you even made me delusional!  That's the kind of power you yield over me.

Maria.  I think I will name my first born Maria.  Maria Kate or Edward-Maria for a boy.

I would like to memorialize you, Maria, with a song that I* wrote:

How do you solve a problem like Maria?
How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
How do you find a word that means Maria?
A flibbertijibbet! A will-o'-the wisp! A clown! A traitor!

Many a thing you know you'd like to tell her?
Many a thing she ought to understand
But how do you make her stay?
And listen to all you say?

How do you keep a wave upon the sand?

Oh, how do you solve a problem like Maria?
How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?

Here is a picture to remember your face by, although it has already been etched on my heart...

According to this photo, you are a very pretty girl. You're welcome.

My blog is always open to you even though you are dead to me.


*No, I did not.


  1. Im not blood,,,,your adopted and not a friend,,,why not sing about me???? I will leave this blog too until there s a song.....

    OK just kidding!! How dare Maria leave this place of cheerfulness and wisdom....RIP Maria its your death of reading humor and intellect!! How do you solve a problem? open the door and let her go.....


  2. Ha Ha Ha! I'm so sorry for your loss. Keep up the blogging and you will get a million Maria's!

  3. To Jonsey- You're the best! I miss you, friend.

    To Heather- I can sing you a song, but you won't like it.

  4. Uh. I'm not Maria? But I might have been a teensy bit unnerved that you wrote a song about me because I left your blog. Remind me never to doublecross you. You might post some unflattering pictures of me dancing or something.


  5. Helllo Anonymous. I do have those pictures you speak of and will use them at the next available opportunity.