Thursday, November 4, 2010


A swatch of a phone conversation from last night:

SOLWGTHAL*:  "I have a joke for you that involves cat-scans."

Me: "Oh?  Do tell!"

SOLWGTHAL:  "You know what I say, if I've lost my sense of humor, I've lost everything."

Me: "Absolutely."

SOLWGTHAL: "An old man brings his very sick dog to the vet one day.  The vet takes the dog back into the operating room and leaves the old man out front in the waiting area.  Three hours later, the doctor returns and reports that the dog has died.  "How can this be doctor?" asked the old man. "Well," the doctor explained, "I gave him a shock to the heart and he came around.  Then, I sent him to get a cat scan, and well, he died."

Me: "... {brain is on fire, scanning through a life time of punch lines requiring abstract thought and logic sequencing (smells of burning rubber, honestly). brain stem is rattling from the neurological strain.  scenes from jr. high running through my head.  small babies. thimbles.  cankles and the roaring 20's.  nothing. comes. to. mind}

SOLWGTHAL: *cackling, hacking and arthritic knee slapping ensues*

[Insert 5 seconds of no dialog here]

Me: "Forgive me, but I don't get it? Can you help me out?"

SOLWGTHAL: *rolls eyes* "It means that the cat circled the dog and it died. The cat scan killed the dog. Is your brain on Holiday, Amanda?"


Oh, the irony of being neurally slapped around by someone who counted a total of 9 lions and 3 peacocks out her bedroom window last spring.  It's her world; we're just drooling in it.

*SOLWGTHAL-  Sweet Older Lady Who Goes To the Hospital A Lot.

1 comment:

  1. Ya know, I sure wouldn't feel bad if I were you. I STILL don't get it, even after you shared with us her explanation.
    I feel the same way about just living in someone's world. I take care of an 82-year-old with Alzheimers. Reality is what is reality to him. There is no way to convince him of true reality, so I live in a world of misunderstood jokes and non-conversation conversations.
    But, I'm so thankful that I'm alive and still understand reality and have an ability to do the mental wranglings required to care for someone like Pop. :)